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Sober support

I decided that yesterday would indeed be Day 1. Do I need to count? Am I making this a bigger deal than it needs to be? Maybe. But a lot of things I've read talk about quitting for 100 days. It's long enough to see a difference and decide if it's worth sticking with.

I went out last night. For a friend's birthday who I'm not used to drinking with anyway, and I had already agreed to drive which meant not drinking wasn't really questioned. I thought about drinking a bit while we were out, but it was ok! I had a nice time, and although I did feel a bit awkward and self conscious that's a perfectly normal reaction to being in a new place with people I didn't know. Maybe those kind of situations get easier as they're handled without the social lubrication of wine.

Miss Poppins was a bit upset when I got in, we had a bit of an argue and a bit of a cuddle. I'm really glad I was sober for that, it wouldn't have felt nice trying to comfort her in a slurry haze.

Today I've been feeling really tired. I think I expected to bounce back and be annoyingly filled with hangover free energy. Apparently it doesn't work like that.

I've joined a site called Soberistas where everyone's on their own little AF journey, some from really dark places, others like me just need to put the brakes on earlier rather than later. It has some great articles and blogs by people who've been through it. Lots of people sharing how tiring the first couple of weeks are, how sugar cravings can hit, and the joys and comfort of hot chocolate.

I'm getting a bit obsessed with the sober world. Maybe I need it to sail me through the first few days, being distracted from wine by... reading constantly about a lack of wine?! It's nice to know I'm not alone though, that other people are feeling the same and that just binning the booze was the easiest and most rewarding option for them. I'm really glad Mr P doesn't drink. Not having alcohol in the house means no temptation. If he was moderately drinking a glass here or there I'd cave I'm sure.

But instead I've indulged myself with a sweet, creamy cocoa and a triple chocolate cookie. If I'm saving 600 calories a day in wine I'm allowed right?!

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